Garden Party
by penna.nomen
Summary: When Eleanor admits she doesn't remember being a good person, Tahani is certain that throwing a garden party will set everything right. Set during the reboot where Tahani is introduced as Eleanor's soulmate.


_A/N: AO3 Chocolate Box exchange gift, inspired by a prompt to see what things were like in reboot #218 where Tahani was introduced as Eleanor's soulmate._

 **Garden Party**

"You'll stand by my side no matter what, right?" Eleanor asked after Michael left her alone with Tahani. They sat on the sofa, and the screen in front of them showed what were supposedly Eleanor's memories.

"Of course, soulmate." Tahani looked around the room with its clown-themed décor, and then patted Eleanor gently on her hand. "You can tell me anything, and of course you know I'll be equally honest with you. For instance, I find your home absolutely adorable, such a precious retreat, but in all honesty you should know that my home is a tad bit more spacious. I assume as soulmates we'll eventually live together, and I have to say I think we'd both be more comfortable in my…" She paused to demonstrate a truly impressive laugh. Who knew a laugh could sound like music? "Well, not to brag, but it's a mansion, you see."

The British accent was so alluring that Eleanor had to pause as the meaning of the words finally caught up to her. "You have a mansion?"

"It's next-door, actually. So convenient. You can see it through your teensy little window."

Eleanor stood and stared out the window. "I saw that when Michael brought me here. Yeah, we're definitely living at your place."

Tahani clapped her hands. "I'm so relieved you like it, but of course I should have known as soulmates that we would be in agreement on something like that."

"Right. I really appreciate the honesty. And in return, you need to know…" Eleanor took a deep breath. "You see those memories on the screen in front of us? All those images of saving lives and helping orphans?"

"Indeed, I've been drawn to it, like a magnet you might say. You see, I spent much of my life helping others. I hosted the most magnificent fundraisers, truly exclusive events with tons of celebrities. These scenes from your life make it clear why we were selected to be together. In fact –"

"That's not me!" Eleanor yelled, unable to get a word in edgewise.

"I'm sorry." Tahani's nose crinkled and her eyes widened. It didn't look like she was used to being interrupted. "What are you saying?"

"Somebody forked up. I mean _forked_ , not _forked_. Why can't I say _forked_?"

"No one curses here in the Good Place. It's much too civilized, and it's so pleasant there's really no need."

"Whatever. None of those memories are mine."

"You have amnesia?"

"No, I remember my life, or most of it. I don't remember the day I died."

Tahani was actually silent a moment and when she responded, she dialed down the bubbliness. "How many people have you met here?"

"Just you and Michael, so far. Why?"

"I've made quite a few acquaintances, actually, and I noticed we're all near the same age. No children, and no one truly elderly." Tahani stood up. "That must mean we're returned to a version of our bodies at our prime, so to speak." She glanced down with understandable pride at her own stunning bod. "Our memories beyond that age are… Well, not accessible to us at the moment."

"So you're saying that I did all this stuff" – Eleanor gestured at the screen – "later in my life. Essentially I turned into a saint, and I don't remember it."

"Nothing else could make sense, could it? I'm sure once we're settled in and being our true selves, those memories will return."

"Right." Eleanor chuckled. "I mean, it's not like the people in charge of the Good Place would make a mistake like letting in someone who doesn't belong, and Michael did know who I was. I'll just give it time, and all the things I forgot will come back to me, you know, like being into women."

"So you're not…"

"Oh, believe me, I find you hot. I thought the guys I dated in Arizona were hot, but they're nothing compared to you. You're like a sexy giraffe. Oh!" She snapped her fingers. "It's already coming back to me. It just hit me like a bolt of lightning that I am legit into you."

"You see? Your true self is emerging."

"Cool. Now all we need is to do something good and selfless, and I'll remember what a saint I was. Any ideas?"

Tahani smiled, her expression one of demure delight. "As a matter of fact, I was planning to hold a garden party tomorrow to welcome everyone to the neighborhood. We'll make our neighbors feel at home and become the best of friends with them."

"Is that saintly?"

"Indeed, for we will work day and night to make it perfect."

#

To Eleanor, it felt more like the robot lady worked day and night, but she did her best to help. As the guests started arriving the next afternoon, she looked askance at the darkening sky. "Do those look like storm clouds to you?"

Tahani glanced upwards. "They do, but Janet promised me that it doesn't rain in this neighborhood. Everyone here prefers bright, sunny weather. In the words of my dear, dear friend Barbra Streisand it shan't rain on our parade. Or garden party."

There was a bolt of lightning. "Okay," Eleanor said tentatively. "I'll just take a platter of these finger food thingies to some of the guests."

"Hors d'oeuvres," Tahani corrected gently, and then she gasped softly. "Oh, my." She stared at their guests.

Eleanor stared, too. "When did they all change into clown costumes? Did you make the dress code match my house? Because I'll admit I don't remember being into clowns. It's a phase I'm glad I've forgotten." She was distracted by a rumbling sound. "Is that thunder?"

Suddenly several unnaturally large giraffes wearing peignoirs ran past them, their silver-bow adorned hooves shaking the ground. Then the rain started. Not a light shower, but a downpour that soaked everyone and ruined the food.

Eleanor turned to Tahani and asked, "Is there something I don't know about how the Good Place works? Is stuff we mention always going to materialize like wishes? I mentioned sexy giraffes and lightning yesterday, and just now you mentioned rain." She held up a hand to shield her eyes from the downpour. "Is Barbra Streisand going to show up?"

Tahani stamped her feet. "I forgot to arrange entertainment! No wonder everything's gone wrong. Fork!"

Giant forks stabbed the ground, accompanied by blasts of thunder. Guests screamed and ran away.

Eleanor tugged Tahani toward the mansion, away from the craziness outside. "Listen, you're hot, but so far that's the only good thing about being here. Are you sure we're in the Good Place?"

 _A/N: It's such fun to imagine what those reboots were like!_

 _Thanks to Silbrith for working her beta reader magic!_


End file.
